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Friday, December 19, 2014

Jesus Fucking Christ On A Menorah

For the enlightenment of readers who aren't on Facebook:

A city official shocked onlookers Tuesday in Massachusetts with his pronouncement during a ceremony marking the start of the Jewish holiday of Hanukkah.

“Jesus is the reason for the season,” said Springfield City Councilor Bud Williams.
Williams, who is Baptist, said he mentioned Jesus after previous speakers referenced “the bright light” from 2,000 years ago, which he took to be an allusion to the birth of Christ.

“Jesus was Jewish,” Williams said. “To me, Jesus is the messiah … I thought I was being very positive.”

“Jaws dropped,” reported the Springfield Republican, but Williams said some participants, including rabbis, thanked him for his remarks afterward.

However, none of them have commented on the record.

“I thought it added something to the service, it didn’t take away,” Williams said.

What an ignorant asshole.  Oh yes, Jesus was part of a revolt 160 years before he was born. 

Added something?  Yeah, you injected your own belief of Jesus' messianic identity into a cermony that has fuck all to do with him, for people who don't share that belief.  That does, really, take away from the service.  

It comes from the sense of entitlement certain Christians positively cling to in this "Christian" nation.  Hey, you don't mind if I tell you who to marry, what to do with your body, how best to worship under the protection of the Christian First Amendment, do you?  A bright light mentioned during the Festival of Lights?  Clearly you must mean Jesus.

As I said elsewhere, I'm sure Williams won't mind when a Muslim mentions the fact that Christ was merely one of Allah's prophets and that Muḥammad was the most perfect of His creatures at the next Midnight Christmas Service.  It's just adding to the festivities, right?


December 19, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Thursday, December 18, 2014

I Don't Know What To Do With White People Offended By This

Seriously, I'm having a hard time understanding how ostensible allies can be offended by this article:

Over the past two weeks, I've seen good white people congratulate themselves for deleting racist friends or debating family members or performing small acts of kindness to Black people. Sometimes I think I'd prefer racist trolling to this grade of self-aggrandizement. A racist troll is easy to dismiss. He does not think decency is enough. Sometimes I think good white people expect to be rewarded for their decency. We are not like those other white people. See how enlightened and aware we are? See how we are good?

Over the past two weeks, I have fluctuated between anger and grief. I feel surrounded by Black death. What a privilege, to concern yourself with seeming good while the rest of us want to seem worthy of life.
We all want to believe in progress, in history that marches forward in a neat line, in transcended differences and growing acceptance, in how good the good white people have become. So we expect racism to appear, cartoonishly evil like a Disney villain. As if a racist cop is one who wakes in the morning, twirling his mustache and rubbing his hands together as he plots how to destroy black lives.

I don't think Darren Wilson or Daniel Pantaleo set out to kill Black men. I'm sure the cops who arrested my father meant well. But what good are your good intentions if they kill us?

When my friends and I discuss people we dislike, we often end our conversations with, "But he means well."

We always land here, because we want to affirm ourselves as fair, non-judgmental people who examine a person not only by what he does but also by what he intends to. After all, aren't all of us standing in the gap between who we are and who we try to be? Isn't it human to allow those we dislike—even those who harm us—a residence in this space as well?

"You know what? He means well," we say. We lean on this, and the phrase is so condescending, so cloyingly sweet, so hollow, that I'd almost rather anyone say anything else about me than how awful I am despite how good I intend to be.

Really, how much empathy do you have for people smacked down by our society's inherent racism if you can't even hear what she's saying, and fall back onto glib dismissals on the order of "all lives matter"?  Fine, you're great, now will you stop being offended--which, yes, is making it about you and comes from privilege--so we can get back to actually talking about the problems of injustice?  Jesus fuck.


December 18, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

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Wednesday, December 17, 2014

I Don't Know How To Say It Other Than, "Fuck You, Governor Shumlin."

God knows you wouldn't want to ask your plutocrat drinking buddies for any coin:

In a striking reversal, Gov. Peter Shumlin on Wednesday abandoned his chief policy initiative, saying “now is not the right time” to pursue single-payer health care reform.

Shumlin dropped the political bombshell with no warning Wednesday afternoon at a crowded Statehouse press conference. He said that new cost estimates provided by his team last Friday made clear that the plan he envisioned was “just not affordable.”

Continuing to fight for single-payer when it would likely hurt Vermont’s economy, he said, “is not good for Vermont and it would not be good for true health care reform.”

Shumlin vowed to pursue more modest measures to slow the growth of health care spending, but his decision to forgo a looming battle in the legislature over how to finance his plan marks the end — for now — of a four-year effort to dramatically restructure the state’s health care system.

It also represents a major political blow to a politician who rode to the governorship on the promise of enacting the nation’s first single-payer system. As Shumlin himself said Wednesday, “This is the greatest disappointment of my political life so far.”

For some people, it's not a disappointment, but more denial of necessary services for them to live.  For some people, it's not a disappointment, but a complete betrayal.

You are not just a disappointment, but a traitor who has cynically and ignorantly undercut all our arguments for, and hard work toward, the best, most cost-effective reform that is desperately needed.  You are not just a disappointment, but clearly a huge mistake made by the voters who trusted you for several years.

I'm not just disappointed, but ready to abandon you and a Democratic party that was at least somewhat on the side of the People here in Vermont even if still way too spineless and right leaning nationally.  Go fuck yourself, loser.


December 17, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBack

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Monday, December 15, 2014

Stop Shooting People Then Nobody Will Be Mean To You

As a Browns fan, I know from disappointment.  For most of my life, they've ranged from sucky all the way to mediocre, with brief moments of pretty-goodness when Brian Sipe or Bernie Kosar were tossing the ball.  I've never been prouder of them than this weekend.

So the Cleveland police can go fuck themselves:

Cleveland Browns wide receiver Andrew Hawkins became the latest player to join on-field protests against recent police shootings of black men on Sunday, when he walked onto the field with a t-shirt that read “Justice for Tamir Rice and John Crawford” over his jersey.

Rice was the 12-year-old who Cleveland police shot in November after they received calls that he was playing with a toy gun in a park near his home; Crawford was killed by police in August in an Ohio Walmart while holding an air gun. Both were black.

Now, the Cleveland police union is demanding an apology from Hawkins and the Browns, saying that players like Hawkins don’t understand the law enough to take a stand.

“It’s pretty pathetic when athletes think they know the law,” Jeff Follman, the president of the Police Patrolman Union in Cleveland, said in a statement to Cleveland news station newsnet5. “They should stick to what they know best on the field. The Cleveland Police protect and serve the Browns stadium and the Browns organization owes us an apology.”

It's pretty pathetic when cops think they can intimidate atheletes who are exercising their First Amendment rights and showing solidarity in a struggle for justice for unarmed black people being gunned down.  Whiny assholes.


December 15, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Engage In The Fucking Debate

Hardly surprising, but more than a little disappointing:

The C.I.A. maintains that the brutal interrogation techniques it used on terrorism suspects a decade ago worked. The Senate Intelligence Committee concluded that they did not. And on that, at least,President Obama is not taking sides.

Even as Mr. Obama repeated his belief that the techniques constituted torture and betrayed American values, he declined to address the fundamental question raised by the report, which the committee released on Tuesday: Did they produce meaningful intelligence to stop terrorist attacks, or did the C.I.A. mislead the White House and the public about their effectiveness?

That debate, after all, has left Mr. Obama facing an uncomfortable choice between two allies: the close adviser and former aide he installed as director of the C.I.A. versus his fellow Democrats who control the Senate committee and the liberal base that backs their findings.

“We are not going to engage in this debate,” said a senior administration official close to Mr. Obama who briefed reporters under ground rules that did not allow him to be identified.

Dude, you are a lame duck with a Republican Congress about to take over.  You're correct on the moral and legal issue, and there is absolutely no political upside to hedging on the pragmatic.  

You want a fucking legacy?  You'd better evolve quickly on this like you did marriage equality if you ever hope to be on the right side of history.

God DAMN, sometimes you can really be an infuriating shithead.


PS--He could still pardon the assholes.

December 10, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

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Tuesday, December 09, 2014

Being Anti-dead-kids Is Not Being Anti-cop

Naturally I love the swearing, as well as the larger point:

As upset as he was over an “unforced error” on Monday, Daily Show host Jon Stewart saved the most anger for Fox & Friends host Brian Kilmeade for invoking the 9/11 attacks to paint Stewart as being anti-police.

“By the way, jackass, you can truly grieve for every officer who’s been lost in the line of duty in this country, and still be troubled by cases of police overreach,” Stewart said. “Those two ideas are not mutually exclusive. You can have great regard for law enforcement and still want them to be held to high standards.”
Fox News quickly accused Stewart of using his show to “slam the cops.” Kilmeade later mentioned that 85 New York City police officers were killed after the attacks “in case [Stewart] wants to include it.”

“F*ck you, Brian,” Stewart said. “Seriously. F*ck you. That is so far out of line, that even within the confines of this bit — ostensibly accepting blame for everything that’s coming my way for a factual error I really do regret, f*ck you. Ears, eyes, nose and throat. In fact, if I hadn’t told you to f*ck off, I would have had to apologize on tomorrow night’s show for being factually incorrect.

Life and politics are generally not zero-sum games.  Unless you have a vested interest in making them so.


December 9, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Saturday, December 06, 2014

The Ghost Of Sci-Fi Yet To Come

This Atlantic article is a piece of shit:

Over here is Le Guin, taking a stand for science fiction on the grounds that "we will be wanting the voices of writers who can see alternatives to how we live now and can see through our fear-stricken society and its obsessive technologies to other ways of being, and even imagine some real grounds for hope." And over here is Star Wars, showing you more pictures of the Millennium Falcon. So much for Le Guin’s call to elevate creators who know "the difference between the production of a market commodity and the practice of an art."

It's not just Star Wars either. Science fiction is everywhere in popular culture, and it seems like it's managed to be everywhere in the present by largely jettisoning the future. The massive, major franchises are all decades-old; the triumphal rhythmic successes of Star Wars and Star Trek and Dr. Who vie with sporadic reboots of Robocop or Planet of the Apes. Even newer stories, like The Hunger Games or Divergence feel less like fresh visions than like re-toolings of stagnant dystopias. Poor George Orwell wants his panopticon back.

First of all, Bentham invented the panopticon, you fucking ignorant douchenozzle.

Second, the author might not have noticed, but Hollywood in general has been recycling and rebooting and re-derivativing and sequeling and prequeling everything for quite a while, so it's not just sci-fi.

Third, please note Le Guin, one of my faves, writes sci-fi, as do many other excellent, imaginative people.  Sci-fi is not limited movies, which is all the article talks about.  There are plenty of new offerings in the literary world.  See Point Second above: the alleged sci-fi problem is Hollywood, not sci-fi as a genre which is still diverse and creative.

Fourth, just because the author is bored with the rich universes that are being revisited, some people like exploring the nooks and crannies for more than a few installments.  That's why people argue about canon and write fanfic and whatnot.

Fifth, what the fuck is wrong with nostalgia?  Did Scrooge McSciFi read A Christmas Carol, or listen to A Child's Christmas in Wales, or watch A Christmas Story just once, then write a screed bewailing how there's nothing new about Santa or Jesus coming out any more?

Get off my moisture farm, asshole.


December 6, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBack

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Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Dilution Of Dissent

Indeed, Fuck CNN:

In the [CNN video], a single protester runs into the camera’s frame and shouts, “F*ck CNN!”

Other demonstrators quickly took up the chant, which was broadcast live to all of Anderson Cooper 360‘s viewers.

“And as you can hear,” said Marquez, “they don’t exactly love CNN, either. These people are willing to protest anything.”

I see what you did there.  If people are willing to protest anything, then really they are protesting nothing, can be dismissed.  Dilute the dissent and we can move on without hearing, internalizing.  Even if we're protesting the media (who is part of the problem, though not quite in the cartoonish, self-serving way Darren Wilson's BFF made it out to be).


November 26, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Monday, November 24, 2014

Speaking Of Ignorant Governors

What a fine ruben you New Yorkers have re-elected:

"We are experiencing a pattern of extreme weather that we have not seen before," Cuomo told reporters Sunday after a press conference about the massive lake-effect snowstorm that hit Buffalo last week and the flooding that's now likely because of warming temperatures. "I don't want to get into a political debate at this time about climate change causes, et cetera. Forget the causes. Is it global warming? Is it reliance on fossil fuels? Forget the causes. What is inarguable is the result."

Dog knows we wouldn't want to address causes to try mitigating these inarguable results.  Hey, let's just blame the NWS!  Cowardly asshole.


November 24, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

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Sunday, November 23, 2014

Ignorant Governors

I see Cuomo is throwing our wonderful, important National Weather Service under the bus, just as Georgia's Guv did earlier this year.  Fuck you, ignorant asshole.


November 23, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Saturday, November 22, 2014

Removing The Mustache Totally Fixed Things

That racist cartoon?  It wasn't meant to be, then it was edited to not be, so what's the big deal?

Gary did not intend to be racially insensitive in his attempt to express his strong views about President Barack Obama’s decision to temporarily prevent the deportation of millions of immigrants living and working illegally in the United States. 

No, of course he didn't intend to be racist.  He just intended to be an ignorant asshole.  BECAUSE THAT'S FUCKING FUNNY!


PS--It ain't a crime to be here without documentation.  See below.

November 22, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

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Thursday, November 20, 2014

White Guilt

Oh, Kansas, you provide us with great mirth and weeping:

Claiming that immigrant rights groups are “calling for the return of the Spanish territory, which could be almost half of the United States,” the caller warned, “When one race or culture overwhelms another culture, they run them out or they kill them. And it’s a bigger issue than just being Democrats. And they know in numbers, once the numbers are so bad, they can pretty much do whatever they want to do.”

“What protects us in America from any kind of ethnic cleansing is the rule of law, of course,” [Kansas Secretary of State Kris Kobach] responded. “And the rule of law used to be unassailable, used to be taken for granted in America. And now, of course, we have a president who disregards the law when it suits his interests. So, while I normally would answer that by saying, ‘Steve, of course we have the rule of law, that could never happen in America,’ I wonder what could happen. I still don’t think it’s going to happen in America, but I have to admit, things are strange and they are happening.”

I can't imagine any ethnic cleansing ever, ever happening on American soil, can you?


November 20, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBack

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Friday, November 07, 2014

A Matter Of Partisan...er, Conscience


Republican members of the Vermont Legislature will be free to vote their consciences in the upcoming balloting to choose the next governor, party leaders said Friday.
Even though recent tradition has been for lawmakers to cast their ballots for the top vote-getter, some Republicans are considering backing Milne.

How sweet they get to vote their consciences!  And their consciences just tell them that they should buck tradition and the top vote-getter because, hey, they got $370k in outside money to win a couple seats in the Leg!


November 7, 2014 in And Fuck..., Conscience | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Thursday, October 23, 2014

These People Have No Souls

Jesus fucking Christ, are there really such people in our world?

I have noticed that on Halloween, what seems like 75 percent of the trick-or-treaters are clearly not from this neighborhood. Kids arrive in overflowing cars from less fortunate areas. I feel this is inappropriate. Halloween isn’t a social service or a charity in which I have to buy candy for less fortunate children. Obviously this makes me feel like a terrible person, because what’s the big deal about making less fortunate kids happy on a holiday? But it just bugs me, because we already pay more than enough taxes toward actual social services. Should Halloween be a neighborhood activity, or is it legitimately a free-for-all in which people hunt down the best candy grounds for their kids?

Not big fans of souling, I see.  Nor wassailiing, I'd guess.  Selfish assholes.


October 23, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBack

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Saturday, October 18, 2014

Firewalls And Ebola

Saw somebody on FB say he didn't care how a travel ban would negatively impact countries where Ebola is at crisis levels.  Must hate fire departments putting out blazes in his community's' homes, because it's not like that shit could spread, and fuck those people for not having fireproof houses, anyway.


October 18, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Tuesday, October 07, 2014

Mighty White Of Them

I can't even:

On Monday night, mostly white St. Louis Cardinals fans clashed with a group of mostly black protesters peacefully demanding justice for slain teenager Michael Brown...
[A] woman shouts, “We’re the ones who gave all y’all the freedoms that you have!” 

And if you don't appreciate us for all that, our white freedom protectors will fucking shoot you.


October 7, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Monday, August 25, 2014

Why Not Wrap It In Bacon?

Oh, Lord:

Sneakers Bistro, a Winooski breakfast hot-spot, is one of several  businesses that has voluntarily maintained a small garden on a plot of publicly owned land to help beautify the city. As part of “Operation Bloom,” participating businesses are allowed to post a small advertising sign in their garden. Sneakers decided to have fun with its sign at the bottom of the Winooski traffic circle. 

“Yield for Sneakers Bacon,” it read.

Not everyone got the joke. 

Last week, a Winooski woman who identified herself as a “vegan and member of a Muslim household,” posted a notice to Front Porch Forum, saying of the bacon sign: “Its insensitive and offensive to those who do not consume pork.” 

Citing Winooski’s demographic diversity — 31 languages are spoken in the local K-12 school — she requested that it come down.
Last Friday, Sneakers owner Marc Dysinger  announced that the bacon sign would come down, saying he didn’t want to offend anyone.

“We regret any harm or damage caused & the sign has been removed,” Dysinger wrote on the Front Porch Forum. “Our goal is to bring joy to Winooski as a community gathering place — never a source of stress or drama. We always appreciate any advice or input to help us achieve that goal. Thank you neighbors!”

Good on Sneakers--one of my favorite brunch sites ever--for making a community-oriented business decision.  But are you really fucking kidding me?  I have a hard time with this complaint, as though dietary choices are on the same plane as, dunno...racism or LGBT-phobia.  

Don't fucking eat God's most perfect food, I could give a roasted rat's ass.  Not sure how you can be offended by somebody else's sign advertising their culinary offerings.


PS--This story only really caught my interest because in Southern VT off Route 100 we saw a sign for a smoked meats biz that said, "WHY NOT WRAP IT IN BACON?"  And really, why not?

August 25, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Friday, August 22, 2014

Judgers Gonna Judge Redux

I guess every once in a while we need to be reminded, there are stuck up sticky beak assholes on the Internet who feel compelled to police parents' photos.  They can fuck right the hell off.


August 22, 2014 in And Fuck..., Family Life | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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Friday, August 15, 2014

And Never, Ever Squeeze The Fucking Charmin

Fuck this shit:

A South Carolina mother was arrested this weekend after she allegedly used profanity in front of her kids. Because a child hearing the F-bomb is definitely more traumatizing than watching her mother get handcuffed in the middle of a supermarket.

According to a report from local news station WJBF, a fellow shopper at a the grocery store overheard Danielle Wolf use the cuss while apparently instructing her children or husband to stop “squishing the bread,” and confronted her about it. The woman then reported Wolf to an official from the North Augusta Department of Public Safety. Wolf was then arrested and charged with disorderly conduct.

“He was like, ‘You’re under arrest’ … right in front of kids, in front of my husband, in front of customers,” Wolf told WJBF.

At this point, I apparently am lucky I'm not in jail for fucking life.  Fuck all the busy bodies and stuck up sticky beaks.


August 15, 2014 in And Fuck..., Family Life | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBack

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Tuesday, August 05, 2014

What Does It All Mean?

Well now:

Okay, this is the lowest new low that NOM has ever reached in their logic against marriage equality yet. In short, they are claiming that same-sex marriage should be illegal because not all chairs are exactly the same. That statement does not exaggerate or misrepresent, I promise you.

Cue Brian Brown:

Dear Marriage Supporter,

Definitions are important. They are the means by which we can reason together and communicate ideas intelligibly. Without definitions, social organization becomes impossible.

The great English writer and Christian polemicist G.K. Chesterton illustrated this principle very clearly in his book Orthodoxy, by taking to task his friend, H.G. Wells, for a particular phrase that Chesterton called "not merely a misstatement, but a contradiction in terms."

Wells had said once that, "All chairs are quite different." And Chesterton, with his characteristic wit and his common-sense, pointed out the obvious problem with that assertion: "If all chairs were quite different, you could not call them 'all chairs.'"

A similar descent into meaninglessness has been the hallmark of the push to redefine marriage.

Uhhh, what? WHAT? Are you f*****g serious? I always knew you guys were stupid, but that stupid? Really? Not all chairs have the exact same characteristics, so same-sex marriage shouldn't be legal?

They're trying to draw parallels to the different chairs to the different marriages. But I am just blown away by their assertion that if two things are not exactly the same in every single regard, detail and characteristic, then they cannot have the same name. Let's extrapolate their logic to some other things.

An important concept Wittgenstein discusses in Investigations is that of "family resemblances":

Consider for example the proceedings that we call "games". I mean board-games, card-games, ball-games, Olympic games, and so on. What is common to them all?
[T]he result of this examination is: we see a complicated network of similarities overlapping and criss-crossing: sometimes overall similarities.

And what you'll find, I think, if you go through a careful study of these various types of games, is that there are similarities and differences. Poker is like chess in certain ways. They both have clear rules and the winner is likely to have practice and skill. But they are different in some ways, too, and if you look at how they are different, you'll find other games that are not different in these ways, but different in other ways.

I can think of no better expression to characterize these similarities than "family resemblances"; for the various resemblances between members of a family: build, features, colour of eyes, gait, temperament, etc. etc. overlap and criss-cross in the same way.-And I shall say: 'games' form a family.

Marriage is like games and chairs: they take many forms and still be recognizable as games and chairs, so too can marriage.

Wittgenstein sums it up for me in Aphorism #43:

[T]he meaning of a word is its use in the language. And the meaning of a name is sometimes explained by pointing to its bearer.

By that I mean, "fuck NOM."


August 5, 2014 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack