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Sunday, September 27, 2015

God Made Two Great Lights


The moon does not make its own light; it reflects light it receives from the sun. 

FUCKING LIARS.  I don't even believe there's gonna be an eclipse tonight.  If there is, it probably means that Trump will win the election or something.


September 27, 2015 in And Fuck..., Mars, Bitches! | Permalink | Comments (1)

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Saturday, September 26, 2015

Politics Is The Art Of The...Oh, Forget It

Saw a meme attacking Bernie because he opposed the Iraq war, but kept voting to fund military operations.  So, uh, let's vote for Hillary in the primary for being more principled!  JFC.

Memes and fish stink after three days...


September 26, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Thursday, September 24, 2015

Rules For Dating My Daughter

Actually the same for my son: not any of these.  Neither kid is chattel, for fuck's sake.


September 24, 2015 in And Fuck..., Family Life | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Unforgiven Kim Davis

Bless Kim Davis' heart:

"What probably hurt me the worst is when someone tells me that my God does not love me..."

Unlike those icky gay people whom God hates?

“No, I’m forgiven — washed clean,” she said.

How convenient!

“I don’t think dignity is guaranteed in the Constitution,” Davis said. “I think dignity is something that you find within yourself.”

I happen to have constitutional precedent right here, and it says even you have dignity.

“I feel really sad,” she continued, “(that) someone could be so unhappy with themselves as a person that they did not feel dignified as a human being until they got a piece of paper. I mean, there’s just so much more to life than that.”

One might say that about being "forgiven" and "washed clean"...


September 22, 2015 in And Fuck..., Constitution, Schmonstitution | Permalink | Comments (2)

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Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Kim Davis Is More Than Free To Grow A Beard

SEK at Salon:

After a brief discussion about what “Jefferson called ‘judicial tyranny'” and the separation of powers, Huckabee noted that the United States government made “accommodations” allowing the Ft. Hood shooter, Nidal Malik Hasan, to grow a beard, and for the prisoners at Guantanamo Bay to do likewise, but “you’re telling me that we cannot make an accommodation for an elected Democrat from Rowan County, Kentucky?”

Huckster ought to first note the word 'elected' in that last sentence.  He might also consider whether banning an inmate's control over his own body is the same as requiring an officer of legitimate government to follow the law when she's not being forced to be gay married, marry gay people, or, you know stop going to church and praying that gay people die and go to hell.



September 16, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Saturday, September 12, 2015


Maher's pretty much a dick, but he is slightly more accurate than a stopped clock:

On his Real Time show Friday night, Maher said:

If you say, as Kim Davis and her ilk, and Ted Cruz and all those people say that actually ‘I can ignore the rule of man because the rule book of God said’ —  then you are Iran. Then you are Saudi Arabia. Then you are Sharia law.

At one point Center for Equal Opportunity Chairwoman and conservative commentator Linda Chavez agreed that Davis was wrong, while pointing out that there are many religious people in the U.S. and “you are going to have to bring them along ” slowly.

Mocking Davis and her conservative Christian supporters, Daily Beast columnist Michael Moynihan, who was one of three panelists along with author Salman Rushdie and Chavez, replied:

I don’t think that’s her intention here, to sort of slowly bring people along to this idea of gay marriage. She comes out of jail. Every Republican is waiting to have his photo taken with her. They have a shout-and-holler Cletus ceremony, everyone is holding up crosses, and Survivor’s ‘Eye of the Tiger‘ is playing… well, I’m glad we’re all coming along very slowly.

Rushdie explained that the delusional martyr complex of Davis and her supporters is a “classic trope of the religious bigot,” noting:

While they are denying people their rights, they claim their rights are being denied. While they are persecuting people, they claim to be persecuted. While they’re behaving colossally offensively, they claim to be the offended party.

Maher added:

Especially Christians. I mean, the whole thing is based on a persecution complex. So when they say things like they’re criminalizing Christianity—really? You’re 70 percent of the population.

I will say that it's not 'Christians' who are being assholes, but rather a particular stripe.  

Speaking of stripes, real persecution is denial of basic civil rights, such as Christians have done to, oh...let's say Jews as an example pulled out of thing air (poisoning wells, causing AIDS, what's the difference?).


September 12, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (1)

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Tuesday, September 08, 2015

Christ, What An Asshole

Well, naturally:

A federal judged ordered Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis be released from custody and her contempt order be lifted Tuesday, but her lawyers said the defiant clerk plans to continue blocking marriage licenses for gay couples when she returns to work.

Davis was ordered into federal custody Sept. 3 after repeatedly refusing to issue marriage licenses to gay couples, saying it would violate her religious beliefs, despite a U.S. Supreme Court ruling against her.

A CNN journalist at the jail reported that according to her attorneys, Davis "has not changed her mind" and intends to bring the licensing process to a halt all over again when she's back on the job.

I guess she misses the lemon-baked fish and other delicacies at Gitmo.


September 8, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (3)

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Saturday, September 05, 2015

Stabbed In The Back

First they came for the bigots:

An attorney for Kim Davis, who was jailed Thursday after being found in contempt of court for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples in Rowan County, Kentucky, compared the clerk's situation to the one Jews were faced with in Nazi Germany.

Mathew Staver, who is currently serving as head legal counsel for Davis, made the comparison on the "Crosstalk" radio show Wednesday, RightWingWatch.com reported. 

"[Davis is] there to do a duty, a job and the job duty was changed," Staver argued. "Does that mean that if you’re Christian, don’t apply here? ... What happened in Nazi Germany, what happened there first, they removed the Jews from government public employment, then they stopped patronizing them in their private businesses, then they continued to stigmatize them, then they were the ‘problems,’ then they killed them."

Yes, part of her duties changed, and she is expected to do them.  Jews didn't stop doing their duties, they were forced to stop by the bigots in charge, asshole.


PS--Let's not fucking forget that it was Christians who shoved Jews into the "unsavory" occupations like banking because golly, we can't have a modern economy without loans, but that's usury, so let's make those dirty people do it.  So you can go right to hell, Mathew Staver.  And you can sit in the back of the bus when you do.

September 5, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (1)

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Indians: Go Home!

Hey, we tried marrying you guys, but then you gave us a one-way ticket to East Bumfuck.

 - My Tsalagi ancestors

Rand Paul is a fucking genius:

GOP presidential candidate Rand Paul took to the airwaves Thursday to broadcast his theory that Native Americans "don't do very well because of their lack of assimilation."

The Kentucky senator's comment followed an exchange with conservative talk show host Laura Ingraham about what she called "separatist" immigrant communities. Ingraham was incredulous that "the MSNBC crowd" supported Jeb Bush's penchant for speaking Spanish at campaign events.

Asked whether he thought speaking Spanish was appropriate, Paul veered off to talk about the only people who never immigrated to this country: Native Americans.

He's like a modern Senator Henry Laurens Dawes.  Without the good intentions.


September 5, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (2)

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Friday, September 04, 2015

Oh, I'm Sure The One Percenters Will Share, Insha'Allah

I do find it funny when folks wonder why all those rich Arab countries don't step up and help those refugees.  Because there are about 12 rich people with the necessary resources...one might call them their One Percent.  And as we know in the Greatest, Richest Country in the World, those guys don't fucking share.  Our aristocracy don't even want to help their own citizens, and get the lower orders to hate others trying to come to the Land of the Free.


September 4, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Tuesday, September 01, 2015

So Help Me G-d

Bless her heart:

After being rebuffed by the Supreme Court and therefore exhausting the appeals process, Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis denied a marriage license to a gay couple today for the fifth time since the legalization of same-sex marriage. Davis is part of a small group of county clerks who claim that their interpretation of divine law trumps their responsibilities as public officials. Demanding that one couple seeking a marriage license leave her office, Davis said that she is acting “under God’s authority.”

She forgot whose authority is at issue, which she swore an oath to uphold:

I...will faithfully execute the duties of my office without favor, affection or partiality...

Do your fucking job, resign on principle, or suffer the sanctions, you obstinate piece of shit.


PS--The KY Leg can remove her, but is currently not in session.

September 1, 2015 in And Fuck..., Conscience, Constitution, Schmonstitution | Permalink | Comments (6)

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Thursday, August 27, 2015

Treason In The Defense Of Bigotry Is No Vice

Dying on Asshole Hill:

A Kentucky clerk's office on Thursday again refused to issue a marriage license to a gay couple, in defiance of a U.S. Supreme Court ruling that legalized same-sex marriage across the country two months ago.
The action Thursday came just a day after a federal appeals court upheld a ruling ordering the clerk in rural Rowan County to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples.

U.S. District Judge David Bunning had already ordered Davis to issue marriage licenses two weeks ago. He later delayed that ruling until Aug. 31 or until the U.S. 6th Circuit Court of Appeals issued a ruling. The appeals court did so on Wednesday, denying Davis' appeal.
Mat Staver, an attorney for Davis, said he was disappointed with the ruling. He said he plans to discuss options with Davis, including an appeal to the U.S. Supreme Court.
It's unclear how Davis would react if she were to ultimately lose her appeals. She testified in federal court last month she would "deal with that when the time comes." Saturday, she spoke to thousands of supporters at a religious freedom rally at the state capitol, saying: "I need your prayers ... to continue to stand firm in what we believe."

"Regardless of what any man puts on a piece of paper, the law of nature is not going to change," Davis told the crowd.

Davis has said she will not resign. She can only be removed from office if the state legislature impeaches her, which is unlikely. If she continues to defy a federal court order, a judge could hold her in contempt and order hefty fines or jail time.

"Certainly none of those are appealing to my client," Staver said. "No one wants to be fined or go to jail and she's always been a law-abiding citizen. She's just caught in a very difficult situation."

She's always been a law-abiding citizen...'cept for, you know, this law.


August 27, 2015 in And Fuck..., Constitution, Schmonstitution | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Because The Gay Agenda Is All About Discrimination

Equal discrimination under the law, bitches!

CRUZ: Imagine if this were inverted. Imagine if there were a gay florist — now I know that’s hard to imagine, a gay florist — but just go with the hypo[thetical] for a second. Imagine if two evangelical Christians came to a gay florist and they wanted to get married, and the florist said, “You know what? I disagree with your faith. I have problems with your faith.” You have no entitlement to force that florist to provide flowers at the Christians’ wedding. We are a pluralistic nation that tolerates diversity.

I think most people just want to smell the flowers and not go out of their way to be dicks to each other.  

But hahaha, gay florist!  And he's still wrong: those unimaginable gay florists should not discriminate in the public sphere, either.  Joke's on you, asshole.


August 25, 2015 in And Fuck..., Constitution, Schmonstitution | Permalink | Comments (2)

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Monday, August 24, 2015

Up Against The Wall Motherfucker

Wait, is that Bernie Sanders?


August 24, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Thursday, August 13, 2015

The Corpse Of Ronald Reagan

Jesus Fucking H Christ On A Casket:

People close to former Vice President Al Gore, who won the popular vote in the 2000 election, have reportedly been discussing whether he could make another run for the White House, according to a report on Thursday by BuzzFeed.

The insiders have been "figuring out if there’s a path financially and politically," according to the news website.

There isn't.  Shut up.  We need Gore like we need Reagan to give it another go.  Just shut up.


PS--There might be a path for me to actually write an epic BLM post.  Maybe I'll just publish my notes and a buncha links and leave it as an exercise.

August 13, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (1)

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Saturday, August 01, 2015

When In Doubt, Troll The Dipshits

Although I don't think responding to stupidity is technically trolling:

[O]ne of the most amusingly off-beat antics of the antivaccine movement was to start a We The People petition to prohibit any laws mandating the force and requirement of vaccinations of any kind:

No human being should be FORCED to be vaccinated against their will and/or personal/religious beliefs. I petition against making vaccinations of any kind mandatory. This includes forcing children to be vaccinated to attend public schools, activities, and daycare centers. This also includes adults working in the public or private sector.

Notice the emphasis on the word “FORCE” (capitalized, of course, for maximum crank effect), which is clearly designed to appeal to Americans’ dislike of being forced to do anything. Of course, it’s not exactly being “forced”; parents can still refuse to vaccinate their children, but their children will pay a price other than being made vulnerable to potentially deadly vaccine-preventable diseases. They won’t be able to attend public school. After having been used to getting easy religious and personal belief exemptions to this mandate (the latter of which basically boiled down to saying, “because I don’t want to”), it is understandable that antivaccine activists would be upset. In any case, they channeled their rage into the petition above (among other places).

How I remember it! As they got closer to the required 100,000 signatures that would trigger a mandatory response from the White House, they got more and more excited. Apparently they thought that the answer would be to their liking. Why they thought that, I have no idea, but now we know the answer. The White House got Surgeon General Vivek Murthy to respond personally to the petition, and I have to conclude that the Obama administration is basically trolling the antivaccine movement. First, the response quotes President Obama from a previous interview thusly:

I understand that there are families that in some cases are concerned about the effect of vaccinations. The science is, you know, pretty indisputable. We’ve looked at this again and again. There is every reason to get vaccinated, but there aren’t reasons to not.

I beg to differ on that last point.  Being a selfish goddamned asshole with a shitty understanding of science is a reason to not get your fucking shots.  Ain't a good one, but it's a reason.


August 1, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Thursday, July 30, 2015

What If Trump Was One Of Us?

What would you ask if you had just one question?

At least 12 voters in the first-in-the-nation primary state of New Hampshire are absolutely gaga over real estate mogul Donald Trump.

Bloomberg Politics' John Heilemann sat down Wednesday night with a focus group of 12 Trump supporters in the Granite State who riffed on why they thought the billionaire was the best candidate in a crowded GOP presidential field.

“He's like one of us," Janet, a former dog breeder, explained. "He may be a millionaire (sic), which separates him from everybody else. But besides the money issue, he's still in tune with what everybody is wanting.”

Many also cited Trump's vast wealth in identifying with him.

"I knew that he was a wealthy, successful man and I remember asking my mother if I could write him a letter to ask him how he made his money so that I could do it too," Jessica, a data analyst, said.

Yes, many people still cling to the mirage that we can all be billionaire blowhards if we just act like this selfish asshole who inherited his Richie Rich Starter Kit.


July 30, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Saturday, July 25, 2015

Come In From The Cold

Let's have a pity party with some nice, hot mint tea:

Centrist Democrats were wiped out in the 2014 elections and in their absence emerged a resurgent liberal movement, embodied most recently by the surprisingly competitive presidential campaign of Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders.

But the suddenly ascendant left — its populist overtones becoming part of the mainstream Democratic pitch — is worrying Democrats who want to compete on Republican-leaning turf. The party lost every competitive gubernatorial and Senate race in the South last year. And Democrats didn’t fare much better in the heartland.
Story Continued Below

Now, as Bernie Sanders’ surge foreshadows a new burst of progressivism, moderate Democrats are looking to their counterparts in Washington with a plea: Don’t freeze us out.

For years you froze progressives out.  Maybe you could try being actual populist Democrats yourselves instead of moderating your shit to be closer to Republicans for a change, spineless motherfuckers.


July 25, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0)

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Friday, July 17, 2015

Fucking Vermont

Given my deep and abiding love for the word 'fuck', not to mention swearing in general, I find these maps of naughty words in the US to be quite interesting.


July 17, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (0)

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So Salon's Gone #SlatePitch?

A thousand times noIT'S TIME TO DRAFT AL GORE - Hillary's flailing. Biden's grieving. Bernie's a longshot. Gore bridges the party's establishment, progressives.

What do you get when you combine Hillary's "flailing" and Bernie's "longshot"?  A drafted Al Gore.  Jesus fuck.


July 17, 2015 in And Fuck... | Permalink | Comments (1)