equilibrium

must be maintained. great joy tempered by sadness. i want to cry like my son does when he has to go back in the light box: my laptop shit its diaper and refuses to start up. i'd say "fuck my life," but it's really amazingly good. but i need a goddamned computer that works, and need access to my (not entirely backed up) files. right now, though, ericka suggests it's the cosmos' way of telling me to be more present with sam. i'll buy that for a dollar... ntodd