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Thursday, June 08, 2006


Lookee what we saw by the mailbox:

Why did the turtle cross the road?

Find out below.

Okay, I lied...

...I crossed the road.  The turtle wasn't freaking moving.  He is gone now, though--to where, I can only guess.

I actually took Mex back to the house, got my camera, and went solo.  Here he greets me at the door with a pathetic whimper, though it looks like he's howling.  I tried get a shot of him leaping in the window, but it didn't work out.

Sam would very much like to leap from the deck, but his brother's in the way.  IDIOT!


June 8, 2006 | Permalink


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When I was a kid we were driving along in the backwoods of Ontario, and in the middle of the road there was a turtle, about a foot or so long. My father stopped he car, saw that it was a snapper, got a branch to sort of move him out of harm's way. *Snap*. Like lightening, jaws on the end of the branch. And he was just trying to help.

Posted by: Drano | Jun 8, 2006 3:41:03 PM

When I had my house upstate, I lived near a pond on a really twisty road. I was driving into town and saw the biggest freakin' snapping turtle right in the middle of the road, not going anywhere, right in the path ofa van, travelling at high speed. The guy stops, gets out, and used his steel-toed boot to push the turtle off the road.

I never knew turtles could hiss like that.

"That's a lucky turtle," the guy said to me. "If you hadn't been standing in the middle of the road, I'd have just run it over."


Posted by: watertiger | Jun 8, 2006 3:47:01 PM

Man, that's one smug lookin' sumbitch, idnit? Looks like it knows somethin' we don't.

Ah, the kidz. Bless 'em both.

Posted by: munkihaid | Jun 8, 2006 4:05:54 PM

Down here, it's gopher tortoise. Their weapon of choice is urine. I got off the bike to move one off the road and the little scamp unloaded about a pint on my shoes.

Posted by: jim shirk | Jun 8, 2006 5:08:05 PM

Did anybody explain to Sam that he could move somewheres else on the deck where his brother isn't and thusly be able to jump?

Posted by: flory | Jun 8, 2006 6:15:53 PM


Much as I hate to think of having anything in common with Katherine Harris, I do think turtles are just too cool for words. Turtles and frogs. Don't know why, but am just fascinated by 'em. Rock on, Vermont turtles. And if you see a marriage-obsessed wingnut in your neighborhood, keep a close watch. Fundie-style family values and box turtle obsession seem to be disturbingly interrelated.

Posted by: jezebel | Jun 8, 2006 7:06:20 PM

One of the highlights of my early childhood memories was of my Dad bringing a rescued turtle home. He drilled a hole in its shell (he promised it didn't hurt) and kept a tether on it. He made sure it was fed and we had a wonderful "pet." (The only problem is that now, as an adult, I'm kind of doubting that was really the right thing to do to the poor little guy.)

Posted by: Sandy-LA 90034 | Jun 8, 2006 7:32:32 PM

That looks a lot more like a tortoise to me. You sure it's a turtle?

Posted by: Houston | Jun 8, 2006 9:20:17 PM

It looks like a snapper turtle head.

We kept desert tortoises for many years, ones that had been born in captivity and ones that had been taken from their natural habitat and were unable to return. They truly are prehistoric and single-minded. My husband loved them and I (who constantly was trying to keep them out of my garden and away from my bare toes while hanging laundry) grew very very tired of them.

Posted by: ellroon | Jun 8, 2006 9:57:02 PM

It's definitly a snapper, note the points on the shell above the tail. I had neighbors that hunted snappers in the river behind my house. They would wade along the banks and where the bank was undercut, would slide their hand against the top of the undercut, and drop their hand slowly down. If there was a turtle under there, they would feel along the edge of the shell for the points, and grab them by the tail to pull them out. Yeah, they would get bit occasionally but still did it, said the delicious meat was worth it. I have seen this done, but never had the guts to try it!

Posted by: FeralLiberal | Jun 9, 2006 6:25:58 AM

Gamera is the friend of all children!

Posted by: Thers | Jun 9, 2006 7:18:37 AM

Holden: You're in a desert, walking along in the sand when all of a sudden you look down.
Leon: What one?
Holden: What?
Leon: What desert?
Holden: It doesn't make any difference what desert - it's completely hypothetical.
Leon: But how come I'd be there?
Holden: Maybe you're fed up. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a tortoise Leon. It's crawling toward you.
Leon: Tortoise? What's that?
Holden: You know what a turtle is?
Leon: Of course!
Holden: Same thing.
Leon: I've never seen a turtle. But I understand what you mean.

Posted by: NTodd | Jun 9, 2006 9:31:45 AM

The word "tutle" makes me laugh. It sounds so goofy.
I pet a snapping turtle once before I realized the damage they could do. Fortunately this one was too tired from laying her eggs to care.
Quite prehistoric they are.

Posted by: mnkid | Jun 9, 2006 11:35:41 AM

I'll think twice from now on before I get out of my car to pick up your mail when I'm on grandpet duty. Even with my bionic knee, I don't think I could win in a tangle with that big turtle guy...

Posted by: NTodd's Pa's wife | Jun 9, 2006 12:57:02 PM

I have to say, I was a little nervous when I saw the title of this post. Back at the Blog-Which-You-Are-Boycotting, mention of turtles often means a mention of Republicans and their weird sexual fantasies.

Thank heavens it was this innocent!

Posted by: Nora | Jun 9, 2006 1:54:57 PM

Great shots! and a beautiful specimen of turtleness (or tortoiseness, as the case may be -- though I agree that that one looks like one big-ass snapper).

Now I'm going to have to look this up; I have always rather arbitrarily believed that tortoises were simply the seagoing branch of the turtle family, or that maybe that tortoise was just a fancy french-type word for turtle but it occurs to me that I don't really know.

Helping turtles cross roads is an issue where I'm in 100% agreement with Katharine Harris. Perhaps the only one. I hope it's the only one, bless her pointy little heart.

NTPw: it's sufficient to just stand to the side and warn car drivers around them if they seem to be in traffic-related danger.

When they do eventually decide to cross, they're faster than you'd expect, although you can probably get out of their way with a bionic knee & all. And they so rarely attack humans who aren't harrassing them or trying to make them into soup.

Posted by: alphabitch | Jun 9, 2006 1:57:41 PM

Mex had to play sloppy seconds to a turtle? No wonder he whimpered. Poor kid.

Posted by: Eileen Left | Jun 9, 2006 2:39:24 PM

Love the nose prints on the Mex's window. Stare at them long enough, and you start to see faces--kind of a Belmez thing.

Posted by: Uncle Smokes | Jun 9, 2006 2:58:20 PM

Can we please add the "turtles" and "sheets" things to the Atriotism wiki?

And, if anyone has an extra minute, bitch-slap John Cornyn on your way out the door.

Posted by: R. Manhammer | Jun 9, 2006 5:05:28 PM

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